Portrait Terri Lemming - Reality TV Scriptwriter

UDP Logo "Will the Undecided Party be trying to participate in any televised leadership Debates?"

Well, Terri Lemming, we at the Undecided Party feel that these pre-election debates have all the usefulness of a screen door on a submarine (something the Navy is apparently looking into at the moment), and only marginally more decorum than the floor of the House of Commons - which itself shows only marginally more decorum than a pre-school food fight. Frankly, we'd rather remain a credible voice in the days leading up to the election.

As anyone who has ever watched one of these fiascos will know, leaders shake hands and then spend the rest of the evening interrupting each other, pointing their fingers in each other's faces, and generally trying to drown out whatever points their opponents are trying to make. And while relatively little information is lost in the bedlam (audiences will know every leader's response or non-response as soon as the question is asked), the behaviour is still so unbefitting someone asking for permission to run the country, that we feel certain steps should be taken to make having to sit through the spectacle slightly less annoying, and slightly less embarrassing for our country.

We at the Undecided Party propose that the next federal election debates be held with each of the candidates confined to individual sound-proof booths (with microphones under the control of the moderator) so that only the candidate chosen to answer a given question will be heard. If other debaters still refuse to wait their turn and attempt to draw attention by banging on the isolation booth's glass, or by making gestures or faces -or, if a candidate refuses to give a straight answer to a simple question- we're not against the idea of administering electric shock to those who insist on wasting the viewers' time - mild at first, but increasing in intensity if candidates persist in ignoring the simple human niceties their mothers taught them.

By making these modifications, we feel that we could bring both relevance and civility to the debating process, and if they prove successful, we may also adapt them to the Commons floor after our election.